I love my children ... I love my children ... I love my children

In 1998, Darling Husband and I decided we were ready to start a family. I finished out my last package of Ortho Novum 7/7/7 and we took the plunge. I had been agitating about having babies for a few years before that, but Darling Husband wasn't quite ready. So in June of 1998, we took a trip to Europe, I took my qualifying exams for graduate school, and we started "trying".

Six months later I was pregnant. I found out just after returning home from Christmas vacation in Florida, on my first day as a full-time graduate student after taking an education leave of absence from my job. And then I lost the baby. Well, it probably was never really a baby. I think it was what is called a "blighted ovum". But, still. After that I was desperate to have a baby. While before we had the attitude of "you know, whenever, we're not going to get crazy about it", now I felt I had to make up for lost time. I bought that fertility monitor thing for $200 and peed on a stick for 20 days during every cycle. Problem was, my hormones are kind of whacky and it never worked for me. We were starting to get concerned, and had pretty much resigned ourselves to adopting, when lo and behold I was pregnant -- 15 months after my miscarriage. And I was overjoyed. In February of 2001, the Eldest Child was born.

I enjoyed being pregnant so much that I was agitating for another one when the Eldest Child was only about 7 months old. It took another 8 months before I became fertile again, but that time we got it on the first try. Again, I was overjoyed. In March 2003, the Middle Child was born.

Fast forward to now, and the Eldest Child is 5 and the Middle Child is 3. And they are DRIVING. ME. INSANE.

I love my children ... I love my children ... I love my children ...

The Eldest Child thinks he is The Boss. He tries to discipline his younger brother, telling him that he can't do this or that instead of letting us, the parents, handle it. All he wants to do is watch TV or play computer games. And if you tell him no, it's time to eat dinner, he starts howling like he's being tortured. I swear, it makes me want to take a hammer to the TV so we can never watch it again.

The Middle Child is getting to me the most. He is the most willful child I've ever dealt with. Maybe it's the age (because I seem to remember saying the same thing about his older brother), but Oh My God I don't know if we're going to survive this. He knows what he wants to do, and by golly he's going to do it no matter what we say. I try and try to use positive parenting techniques but what I really want to do is smack that smug little smirk off his face. Sometimes I can really sympathize with people who end up abusing their kids, as horrible as that sounds. I guess the key is to recognize that it's still not appropriate.

I love my children ... I love my children ... I love my children ...

The Baby is my favorite (behavior-wise) right now, because he's too young to get into too much trouble or to talk back to me. But those nights when he wakes up 5 times and I get about 2 hrs of consecutive sleep...

Anyone have the phone number for those gypsies?

I love my children ... I love my children ... I love my children ...

I've posted some recent pictures here. Can' t you just see the evil in their eyes?